Self and other in relationships with narcissists

The nature of the narcissistic self has captured the persistent attention of theorists and researchers. We contribute to this literature by investigating whether narcissism (neurotic, antagonistic, and agentic) is related to low self-differentiation. We define the latter construct in terms of weak emotional and cognitive separation from others, especially close others, resulting in emotion dysregulation. We conducted three studies. In Studies 1 (N = 284) and 2 (N = 349) we tested participants individually, whereas in Study 3 we tested (heterosexual) couples (N = 203 couples). Across studies, high neurotic and antagonistic narcissists manifested low self-differentiation.  In Study 3, high agentic narcissists manifested high self-differentiation, yet their relationship partners evinced poor self-differentiated selves; additionally, low self-differentiation was linked to poor relationship quality. The findings address and clarify the nature of the narcissistic self and its implications for relational functioning.